Let’s Talk About Love, Love, Love!

I can still remember clearly the first time I had a crush. I was I kindergarten and my mom told me that I was just a “saling pusa” that time. I was in my big brother’s class and he had a classmate named Marlon. He was so told and he had beautiful eyes, he was the first ever crush that I had my whole life.

The reason why I am writing this one is because of a call I had last week. The security question I the account was ‘When did you got married?’ It was really sweet to use that as the security question since most people that I know can’t even remember to celebrate anniversaries anymore.

I’m in the early twenties and up to know I am still single. I’ve had a couple of flings and a few relationships before but I guess none of those meant to last. I really think I am afraid to commit to anybody. I have crushes and I consider myself dating at the moment but most of the guys that I like are gay. Well, I have crushes with straight guys but some of them are in a relationship and most of them are married.

I think that the main reason why I find it hard to find a guy that will make me fall is that I don’t believe in love anymore. Most of my married girlfriends says that I am only thinking this way because I am still young and I haven’t found the guy that will make me head over heals. Well, I don’t see myself getting married in any way. I don’t like the thought of having kids and settling with just a single man. Whenever I date somebody, the first thing they talk about is marriage. I really do get turned down once they babble about that kind of stuff. A typical guy wants to be tied up to a girl that knows how to cook and who love kids. Well, in my case, I want a guy who will accept me even if I am not a great cook. I want a man who will still be happy to be with me even if I don’t want to have kids. I want a guy who just wants to be with me and not to make me some kind of a baby maker and cook. I want a man who will love me and accept all the imperfection I have.

I think that I am not the romantic type of girl. I like adventure. I even like competition. I get more attracted to guys who are in a commitment. I guess they are harder to please and it’s really challenging. I easily fall for bisexuals because most of them can understand all my mood sings. They are also very witty and there are no dull moments with them.

Well then, I guess love is not for me. Like what Nicholas Sparks said I his book A Walk to Remember, ‘Love is a leap of Faith’. We have to believe in it to feel it. We have to have faith in order to find true love ad be loved in return.